The Scientist
by riotland
Summary: As the years go by, Tris has a surprise visit in the middle of the night, her long-lost rommate, Tobias Eaton. This unexpected reunion reminds her of their past together, but it also makes her wonder about a possible future. Can they make it happen? Inspired by the song "The Scientist" by Coldplay. One-Shot


"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage"- Lao Tzu 

The loud screech of the doorbell, made me forget of what I was dreaming. I opened my eyes, confused and outworn. The alarm-clock showed it was 3:16am. The doorbell rang one, two and three times more.

I jumped out of bed, and turned the lights on. I was dressed with my yellow nightgown, and a pair of socks, with little hearts in it. I didn't worry about how I looked, because I was convinced it was Christina outside my house, having one of her midnight crisis or urgent problems, which couldn't be solved talking on the phone.

I put on a long-sweater. The night was cold, and the rain kept falling on my window pane.

The doorbell rang once again, making me shout: "I'm coming!"

I looked for the keys, and when I opened the door, my heart suddenly stopped. The person standing at my door wasn't Christina; it wasn't Peter, or Caleb. It was my long-lost roommate, Tobias Eaton.

At first i thought i was dreaming, that it was my mind fooling me, but seeing him so different made me realize, i was wide awake, and it was reality calling at my door.

He had changed so much through the years.

His hair was longer than before, his body was better built and his eyes were still breathtaking. He was surprised to see me too; we were both quiet and still, admiring each other.

\- Tobias- I said calmly. He was soaking wet from head to toe. I couldn't leave him there petrified until he decided to talk- Come inside

I closed the door behind me, as he entered. Tobias looked me in the eye, for the first time since forever and smiled.

\- Hi Tris is good to see you. You look amazing- I admired my gown and childish socks, and my cheeks got red in an instant- you still blush so easily.

\- It's good to see you too- I said as I heard him laugh, a sound which made me feel so nostalgic. When I was about to talk, he interrupted me.

\- Do people still call you Tris? - Tobias said with a smile and curious eyes

\- Only Caleb and my father. If you don't mind I ask, what are you doing here? I thought you lived in Washington

\- I was around the neighborhood, and thought it was a good idea to come, and say hi. Besides, I missed Chicago, and I missed you- Tobias said smoothly and so natural. I wasn't expecting that response, and panicked, feeling a rush through all my body, feeling like a teenage girl once again.

\- D-do you want some coffee? - I said shyly looking at my feet

\- Yes, that would be nice- He said with a witty smile, a classic one of him

I entered the kitchen, trying to calm me down. And as I looked for the coffee-maker, I started wondering about Tobias Eaton, and our early days together. That didn't surprised me, because more and more those days, when I looked at Peter in the eye, or drove past our old school ,I caught myself thinking about him.

Tobias wasn't someone I was friends with from the start. I could remember doing things with Will and with Christina, but not with him.

He was the mysterious and rebellious friend of Zeke. I had always seen him around, going to some reunion, or hanging out with his friends, but I had never talked to him, until the third year of college. It was one night of summer, right up until the warm weather faded; when I ended up at a party, god know why. Christina had disappeared, Cara as well, and I was alone outside, waiting until someone decided to leave. I remember I had a lot going on at that moment, and was so immersed in my thoughts; I didn't realize Tobias was standing next to me, trying to start a conversation. He didn't flirt with me, or said some stupid compliment about my appearance, as the other boys did. He asked me if I was okay, he realized I was feeling down, and a bit lost at the moment. We started chatting, and ended up the whole night talking. In that moment I became conscious that he wasn't the "mysterious and rebellious friend of Zeke", he was so much more.

He told me he was studying for the politics major and that his main goal was to improve people's lives. He was surprised when i told him i was studying to be a scientist, and that i had the same goal as him. It was that night that I noticed; i wanted to get to know Tobias better.

As time went by, we both recognized, we looked for each other's company constantly.

I don't remember when was the precise moment i fell in love with him, all i know is i loved him with all my heart and soul.

I thought at first he didn't feel the same, He kept his feelings distant and seemed like he only wanted me as his friend.

It was a year later, in which i had problems, regarding money. I had no job, and collage was getting harder to pay each month, as well as the dorm room. Tobias, kind and solidary, as he always was, offered me to live with him in his apartment. So we not only were friends, but also roommates.

I loved living with him; we knew each other so well, that all the other aspects fell into place. We knew each other obsessions, times and weaknesses. Even when i got a job, and money of my own, i still decided to live with him, and he never complained. He wanted me by his side too.

One windy night, i couldn't sleep, and decided to turn on the light and read a book. Tobias was awake too and came to my bedroom, to make me company. That day, unexpectedly, he confessed me, i was the first person he completely trusted, and out of the blue, he kissed me.

He kissed me and everything changed. We had the best years together, friends who were in love with each other, lovers who trusted each other. We would take the best of the other, our weaknesses and obsessions suddenly disappeared.

In my memory, the earlier years, were the golden years, and when i thought about them, i felt a sort of glow. But the later years felt different, they were more serious and in some ways, darker.

Things changed rapidly, like day moving into night. We found ourselves fighting constantly, about every single detail in our lives. Everything one made bothered the other one. Our understanding and peaceful relationship disappeared, after so many years of trust and love, appearing as a complicated and argumentative one. I believed that in the moment, we were going through a rough patch, maybe a bad time for both of us, but Tobias didn't agree. I understood it, once he faced me, and told me what he truly felt.

\- Tris, listen, i thought about this for a while, and, this isn't working, you know, all we do is fight- Tobias said to me, looking anywhere but my eyes.

\- Yes, i thought about the same too. I been having some issues, with work, and with my mother's death, i haven't been good recently. I just want things to go back to how they used to be- i told him sincerely and sadly

\- I Know, b-but I can't do this anymore. It is over; it has been for a while. We are trying to force something that will not happen.

\- So what does this mean? Things don't work because we fight? We are always going to fight… This is really hard for me Tobias- i said trying not to break my voice, but failing miserably

-This is hard for me too. I don't mean to hurt you, you know that. I just want to do what is right for both of us.- Tobias said, while he grabbed my hand

\- I can't believe this. How can you do these to me? After everything we ve been through- i said taking my hand away from his, and as i walked away from him, tears appeared in my eyes. - You are not the person i fell in love with, Tobias, he would never do this to me. I hate you so much.

\- Tris? Hello? Earth to Tris, are you still with us?- Tobias smooth voice brought me back to the present, ending the trip down to memory lane.

I smiled and nodded, feeling unprotected, having the impression that he was able to explore my thoughts, my emotions towards him.

I handled him the cup of coffee, still feeling our memories impregnated on me.

\- Black coffee, with no sugar, right?

\- You remember- Tobias said with a little smirk appearing on his lips.

\- i made you coffee, everyday, for like, three years, that is not something you easily forget- i said smiling, trying to look calm and harmonious. He grinned at my words, and his eyes showed that little sparkle, the one which appeared when he was happy. It felt like it was just yesterday when i saw it for the first time.

\- Tris, listen; i come up to meet you, to tell you I'm sorry... I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry i gave up on us, I'm sorry i wasn't as patient and strong as you were and...I'm sorry i left you alone, when you just needed someone by your side- Tobias said so outspoken and sorrowful, making me feel heartbroken, as i was years ago.

\- Its okay. We tried, these things happen- i said trying to calm him

\- No, it's not okay. I had lied to myself through all this years, saying the same thing over and over. But it's not okay. You deserved better Tris, you always did.

\- Tobias, stop it- i said as i interrupted him- Its useless to worry about things that happened in the past, things you cannot change.

\- But seriously, Tris. I'm awfully sorry. I am, honestly

I gave him a smile and said with no irony:

-look, Tobias, it occurred years ago, and its now one hundred percent forgotten. I don't hold it against you one tiny bit.

He still looked unsure, but he gave me a quick smile and patted my shoulder, as we both walked towards the living room.

We started talking, telling each other what had happened in our lives after we broke up. He told me, he worked with the current government, and was incredibly proud about it. I told him about the work my team and i had been doing about finding the cure for terminal illnesses. We chatted for hours, as we used to when we were younger, and somehow, the years after our split, seemed that they had never happened. We still found ourselves comfortable with the other.

After we finished talking about our adventures, when we were together, we both stayed in silence for some moments, until my long lost roommate decided to break the quietude

\- i Wish we could go back to the start- He said as he sighed and looked me straight in the eye- i wish you could tell me your secrets, and ask me your questions, as you used to do.

\- Running in circles, chasing our tails , once again? Are you sure?- i said as i giggled

But he didn't laugh with me, he didn't even smile. He looked serious and thoughtful, making me feel anxious. He wasn't joking, he was telling the naked truth, being genuine about us.

\- I had to find you, and tell you i need you Beatrice Prior

\- Tobias...- I started saying

\- Please tell me you still love me Tris, come back and haunt me. Take me back to start- Tobias said with precision and veracity as he came closer to me, grabbing me gently by my shoulders, and getting little by little, closer to me. The scent of his skin reminded me of happier times, and also got me nervous as i felt it more and more.

\- Tobias... I-i don't know. We are completely different people than we were before. Pain and suffering makes people change... It would be really hard

\- I know, i know, but we can try, we can give us a second chance. Nobody said it was easy Tris, but I'm willing to take all chances

\- I'm...im sorry, but i cannot get hurt again, it broke me entirely the last time. I still love you, and i really hope your heart can be happy, but i don't think i can do it

It seemed ages passed when Tobias decided to speak. He stepped back and sighed, his sight lost somewhere i didn't know about.

\- I-i have to go- Tobias said, his voice wobbling slightly - Im sorry i bothered you.

He grabbed his coat and walked slowly to the door. A look had appeared in his eyes that made me catch my breath. It reminded me of sorrowful times, one look which shattered my soul.

I wasn't able to move, i stood there feeling more confused than before he appeared at my door. I felt pity for him, but also remorse. A million questions bombarded my head, but one was consistent and clear: What if?

"What if i pretend nothing happened and move on with my life? What if i regret it later? What if im brave and take a chance?"

I closed my eyes and analyzed all my thoughts, pulling the puzzles apart. But i already knew, it wasn't my mind which had to decide. Questions of science, science and progress, do not speak as loud as my heart.

Why was i thinking this over and over again? I knew the answer right from the start.

Without realizing it, my feet were already running to the door. I felt adrenaline and excitement through all my body. Outside was still raining but i didn't care, i didn't care at all. I was shouting his name, and running on the street, feeling my clothes clinging my body and my feet cold and wet.

After i ran a few blocks, i saw him walking slowly, not being bothered by the rain. I shouted his name one more time, making him turn around. As i came closer to where he was, trying to catch my breath, i saw a smile appear in his face.

I was so deep in the moment that i could only mutter a few words. But they were the exact words my long-lost roommate wanted to hear.

"Tobias, take me back to the start"


End file.
